How many boyfriends did you really have?- Social Media

                You remember all of us back in middle school, right? We thought we were such the hot stuff. We knew the ins and outs of dating… well kind of. It was the kind of relationship where you only hung out at school (only for some), and if you saw them at the grocery store with your mom, it was an awkward situation. Like… you ran to a different isle in hopes that they wouldn’t see you.

                Thank God for Bebo. Bebo was the social networking for preteens back in my day; the junior Facebook, if you will. It was neat to go to someone’s profile and see their Skin (background) and read a little about them in their About Me. They had a certain number of Top Friends that they could list out of their whole Friends List, and usually you could tell who was dating who by their Other Half. The Other Half was decided by an Other Half Request, and, if accepted, would show up with a little description in the main part of your profile, right under your About Me. If you didn’t have a boyfriend or girlfriend, it was mostly your best friend.

                The funny thing looking back on it is that my first ever “boyfriend” (NOT a steady relationship… AT ALL) asked me to be his Other Half in the 7^th grade, and I accepted thinking that we would get to know each other better over Bebo.

                First you have to know a little background: I was new to his school. I knew hardly anyone, and the friends that I did have decided to set me up with a jersey to wear for that Friday night’s football game. This jersey thing was crucial back then. If you didn’t have it you were committing social suicide. A boy by the name of Aaron had just finished his off and on (drama filled) courtship with another girl for the last time I was told to believe. So naturally my friend got his jersey and gave it to me, with no communication between Aaron and me. At the time, I thought this was politically and socially correct. Dumb me.

                So later that week at lunch, I got asked out by him through another friend. With my gained maturity I would have thought, “Who does that?” But looking for social acceptance at the new school, I eagerly accepted. The maturity that I did have at the time pushed me to walk over there and sit down at his table and eat the special lunch that I packed for myself due to my braces that I had just gotten. Talk about growing up.

                Starved for peer existence in my life, I would get on Bebo almost every night. Only that night I was surprised to see Aaron’s profile. Under it said that he “loved me.” Shock to the system. What did love mean? And if he truly did (which he MOST definitely did NOT), why couldn’t he have told that to me? I was also stunned to notice his Hobbies column. Under it said the usual “sports, hunting, fishing, music,” but at the end he added “spending time with Morgan.” What? When had we ever spent time out together? We hadn’t and we never would.

                The only thing that we managed to do, other than right silly immature notes in the hall, was write on each other’s Bebo profiles. It made it really easy and safe to express who I really was (not like he knew) to him through an electronic outlet. Like a star struck little girl, I would carefully plan my replies with clever jokes and uses of the (annoying) smiley face and @hearts; symbol. Barf?

                Let’s just say that I’m completely ashamed and embarrassed of this situation. It was a relationship that might as well not have been at all. Nothing was gained, and a lot was lost. My pride was a factor. But then again, wasn’t everyone else doing it? Breaking up, making up, dating everyone in their class. I was just trying to fit in, and, by the looks of everyone else’s profile, I was doing or saying nothing wrong. The only difference between me and them was I never sought out more relationships or tried to get him back. While other girls kept dating, I refused to stoop to something so pointless. What is the purpose of being in a “relationship” if you can’t talk to them while in school, go to movies, or go skating together? In the stages where dating was the “thing” to be doing, we set ourselves up for trouble when we actually wanted to find that someone special and settle down.

                How are we supposed to meet new people and attract our future spouses when we relied on the Internet and texting so much? Adults don’t off the cuff start dating without ever seeing that person in actual person. So here come the problems: talking, eye contact, interacting, and expressions.

                Too many people nowadays are antisocial, awkward, and introverted. I know there are every levels of the outgoing spectrum, but God created Adam and Eve… not Adam, Eve, and a Dixie cup with string. He meant for us to be in each other’s presence.

                Our people skills are skidding downhill and will continue to do so, if we don’t extend ourselves socially and step outside to reality. We are too afraid of being judged and ridiculed. All we can see are the bad things that will come from personal interaction: What if they don’t think I’m attractive? What if I don’t act right? They’ll probably think I’m not buff enough. Most are appearance related, which leads to “cat fishing,” fake profile pictures, and Photoshop. Virtual relationships simply aren’t healthy; because you aren’t dating that person… you’re dating the person’s photo and typed words. (974)